Archive for September, 2012

Oh Georgie…

25/09/2012 11 comments

Georgie Thompson’s role in the Sky Sports Sky Pad is probably to serve as “eye candy” for the male viewers. Cause she doesn’t really add any valuable comments or insights. In fact most of her comments are so meaningless I might as well be up there with Anthony Davidson. However “eye candy” is relative and I don’t find Georgie to be eye candy at all. Don’t get me wrong, Georgie isn’t ugly, her clothes are ugly.


I mean it.

That woman needs a stylist stat (me, perhaps? ;)). Let’s take a look at what she wore at Monza on race day:

As I’ve pointed out on my screen cap, there are many things wrong with Georgie’s look. First of all, her hair was HORRIBLE. Don’t they have hair stylists over there at Sky Sports? Come on, Lee McKenzie would never appear on the BBC looking so haphazard. It was just a mess and Georgie looked like she rolled out of bed 15 minutes ago, freaked out, grabbed the nearest hair tie (which happened to be YELLOW by the way), put her hair up and ran to the studio.

I’m pretty sure both men and women can agree that Georgie’s dress was simply horrible on many levels. The cutout bodice was sort of strange. While the cutout does drew the eye to her bust, the shape was reminiscent of a “no sign.” Such as NO SMOKING. Or NO PARKING. Basically any sort of sign with a slash through it. In other words, please do not replicate this look. Ever. Just don’t do it. And the dress was too tight. WAY too tight. It was so tight, Georgie’s muffin top was bursting through (gross, I know…).

Remember my previous post about the history of clothing sizes? Today I shall illustrate an example of poor fit with Georgie Thompson’s help. -_-;

Some people do not know what constitutes good and poor fit. Let me tell you, you don’t need a clothes whisperer or anything. Your clothes can “talk”… you just have to be able to understand what they are saying. Once you do, you will realize they may be screaming at you “HEY IT DOESN’T FIT! HELP ME!!!”… such is the case below:

Wrinkling and ripples in clothing are key indicators of poor fit. It means the clothes are too small for your body in a certain area. Sometimes the clothes will pull in such a way that it will look like arrows, pointing to the area of poor fit (such as the crotch!). In Georgie’s case, all of the ripple action is happening at the waist and hips. While the dress fits at the bust, it is pretty much saying “Georgie your waist/hips are too big for me.” The reason why the dress ripples is because the dress is shifting up to accomodate Georgie’s waist/hips. Does that make sense? If her hips were smaller, the dress would be able to hang straight and there would be no wrinkling.

Here is another illustration from a side view:

Remember the show Are you being served?? One of their favorite lines was “Don’t worry, it will ride up with wear.” Unfortunately, clothes do ride up with wear, especially ill fitting ones! In Georgie’s case, take a look at all the fabric bunching up at the waist. Sure, I see the lump for the microphone. But the fabric is also bunching at the side seams and underarms. Poor Georgie’s dress is crying out for help. “Help me… her butt is a little big for me… I don’t have any choice but to go up!”

Let’s all learn a lesson from Georgie here. Please remember, just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. That is to say, just because you can squeeze your body into a certain size, doesn’t mean it fits. Afterall, looking like a sausage is never a good look, and it certainly isn’t sexy! I’m never one for fashion rules, because afterall, rules are fun to break! 😉 But it is true that for most people, absolutely skintight dresses are not the most flattering. Body skimming clothes tend to be more flattering and leaving a little something to the imagination never hurt either, right? 😉

I shall end this post with a bit of humor. I swear Georgie looks massive next to Anthony… and I always compare the size of their arms whenever they are on screen:


Size Matters!

24/09/2012 1 comment

We live in the times of disposable clothing, fast fashion, and sales sales sales. As a result many people end up wearing ill fitting clothing. Think about it. Everyone’s body is different, so how can there be a “one size fits all”? In fact, how ARE sizes determined? Well, it’s a little complex and a little bit of history is needed.

Mens’ clothing size was first standardized to facilitate the production of military uniforms and was based on chest size (sound familiar gentlemen? :)). It is assumed that all measurements are proportional (neck, waist, hips, and thighs) and that is the basis of mens’ commercial sizing today!

Women’s clothing sizes became “standard” much much later. With the industrial revolution and new technologies, “ready to wear” became more accessible and popular. But sizing was all of the place back then as well so the U.S. Department of Agriculture conducted a survey of women’s body measurements to create a sizing system. 15,000 women were surveyed between 1939 and 1940 and after mining the data, a size system was created.

The women’s system was based on bust measurement and sizes ranged from 8 to 38. The height of a woman was also taken into account (short, regular, and tall) and hip fullness (slender, average, and full).

So how is this relevant to sizing today? To be honest, it isn’t! First of all, the survey was skewed. Those who participated often needed the money from the survey, and those who needed money tended to be slim and at times malnourished. Data from factory workers who were more fit than the average woman at the time were also gathered. Measurements from non-whites were also discarded. In other words, the data from this survey was not really representative of the population at the time, let alone now! The modern women’s sizing system is still derived from this outdated survey*.

Why is it that different brands have different sizing?

Well, it’s about brand image really. A brand will cut its clothing based on the image it wishes to project and the brand’s target demographic. Therefore as a customer, choosing your clothes is a bit like choosing your identity. Which brand do you identify with? Which brand is representative of your lifestyle (or the lifestyle you aspire to have)? Etc. Get it? It all comes down to marketing. Sad, isn’t it?

So why don’t my clothes fit?

Because there is something wrong with you! Just kidding. Well, to put it simply, if you don’t have an average body type, things are tough. Most men are slim, with few curves. So if you are a man that works out and has significant muscles in certain areas, off the rack clothing will not fit right. Women that are not slim hourglasses and non-B-cups will also have problems finding properly fitting garments. The reality of “ready to wear” these days is that customers are simply buying clothes that fit “well enough.”

What the hell am I supposed to do then?

There isn’t an easy answer to this. Unfortunately most people will have to try to find “their brand,” by trial and error. Simply try different brands and see how they fit on your body. Sometimes off the rack clothing can fit great… and when it doesn’t… it may be time for some alterations at the tailor…

I hope this blog post wasn’t too dry… there is a point to it. It is setting up the knowledge base needed for my next post. Look forward to it guys! 🙂

* Note: There have been additional surveys, but the post was already getting a bit long and dry. If you wish to find out about, do a web search on: ASTM D-5586 Ellen Goldsberry, TC2 Size USA. 🙂

Toying with a new idea

04/09/2012 2 comments

One of the most popular subjects on this blog is the F1 WAGs. Though I haven’t done that type of entry in quite awhile. I was considering replicating some of the F1 ladies’ makeup looks. It wouldn’t be a youtube video because good lord, I’m even less HD ready than Nico Rosberg. Instead it’d most likely be photographs with the format blatantly stolen from Japanese magazines.

Would it be a good idea? Bad idea?

I’m kind of ambivalent about the whole thing as I want to keep this as a unique humorous blog. In addition I am a huge makeup snob and many of the products I use are usually not widely available, discontinued, or expensive. However it might be more useful to focus on techniques instead of actual products. Drop me a comment or a line on twitter and let me know 🙂

Categories: Uncategorized